Thursday 27 September 2012

The Joys of being a mom vs The Joys of being a mom to a special needs child

After a week from hell....and that is putting it lightly I have a few things I want to say to help people figure out what life is like. Although the people who don't understand most likely wont be reading this blog but at least I can get it off my chest. 

"Oh the joys of being a Mom"

We have all had someone say that to us when we are complaining or bitching about something that has happened and has left us frustrated. I am sure I have said it multiple times to all kinds of people. But every once in awhile someone says something to me and I have my moment of....no, this is not the joys of being a mom, this is not what I signed up for, this is not what any of us wish or dream about, this is not what the majority of people go through, so no this is not the joys of being a mom. This is the struggle of being a mom to a child with special needs. Let me help you understand.....

Your child cries
  • you pick them up and snuggle
  • put on their favorite tv show
  • give them their favorite toy
  • play with them
  • or just let them have a tantrum because you know it is nothing serious
  • they have a way to communicate to you what is wrong
My child cries

  • I play a guessing game about what is wrong
  • I give tylenol because I have no idea what is going on
  • I can snuggle
  • I can let her cry and I do let her cry not knowing what is wrong

Your child gets sick

  • They can have a drink of water to rinse their mouth
  • They can blow their nose to get rid of the vomit that came out their nose
  • They can eat something to settle their stomach
  • They can tell you that they don't feel hungry

My child gets sick

  • She can't drink
  • She can't blow her nose
  • I must sit there and try to stick a tissue up her nose to try to get rid of it
  • I can try to put a damp facecloth in her mouth to rinse it out but she closes her teeth and this is very hard. 
  • I feed her because I don't know when she isn't hungry and most times just make her get sick again. 

I think I can stop now....I probably could go on forever but I know that isn't necessary. I have had one of the most stressful weeks yet and just needed to get a few things off my chest. 

I don`t need a pity party just an ear to listen. 

I don`t expect special treatment but just for people to lend a helping hand if they feel I am getting down. 

I am guilty of not accepting help because I think I can do it on my own....but who am I trying to prove that too..

And never ever forget that I love Addison with all my heart and would climb to the moon and back for her but I have days that are hard and make me realize how much harder I have to work as a mom and wonder...why me?

That's all 











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